Thursday, July 16, 2009

And so it begins..... soul's tormented journey into the agonizing, black abyss of heartbreak, sorrow and misery. Also known as: time to start making plans for our move back to the States.

O got his official notification that he is within 1 year of the end of his tour, and it's time to start the process of making plans for whatever it is we want to do, i.e. extend our tour in Japan one more year (what I want more than anything!), request another full, 3 year tour in Japan, transfer to another overseas base, head back to the U.S. ........ He'll need to contact his "Detailer", the person who will, well, work out the details of our move, and let them know what he wants to do.

I've got my eye on Langely AFB, in Virginia Beach. If we HAVE to go back to the States (I'm going kicking and screaming, my overwhelming preference is to stay overseas) Langley is my first choice. While Otis doesn't have absolute power over where he gets transferred to, Uncle Sam makes the ultimate decision, he does get to have some say in the plans, and can probably work it out in our favor.

I've been dreading this time since before we even left Florida, knowing the day would come, waaaay too soon, that I'd have to leave Japan again. It's been hanging over my heart like a grumpy, little, black rain cloud since the day I stepped of the plane at Narita. I knew I'd only get 3 years here, and have really tried to make the absolute most of every second, but everything has been tinged with a little hint of bittersweet sadness, knowing my time was so limited. My heart is literally breaking thinking about my last day in Japan.

I love Japan so much, it honestly feels like home to me. This is where I spent my childhood, and when we got here in August 2007, I really felt like I was home at last. I was immediately comfortable and relaxed, there was no culture shock, no homesickness for the States, nothing but pure joy and a sense of contentment that I hadn't felt is such a long time. And those feelings have stayed with me every second that we've been here. But, I knew it wasn't forever. I knew this day would come. And I know that going back to the States is what's best Otis, the kids need their dad, they miss him so much and we all miss them, it's best for Meg too, she really misses her dad and bonus mom. Not to mention the grandparents and other assorted family members. I know it's not fair to ask anyone to sacrifice anymore. *Sigh*
And so it begins............


gigihawaii said...

Oh, I see the connection now. I didn't know you spent your childhood in Japan. Now, it makes sense.

If you stop in Hawaii, let me know and I'll show you and your family around. You can find my email addy in the ABOUT section of my blog.

The Reedys said...

I'm sighing with you. It's such a hard transition isn't it? Well, if you do end up getting orders here to Langley, let me know... :)

Sara said...

haha although i would trade with you in a second (at this point I would love to go back to the US for a few years)

i totally understand how it feels to have to pack up and leave to move somewhere you really don't want to be!!

i hope you can work something out to stay in japan a bit longer or if not get put in a place that you will feel comfortable in!

got my fingers crossed for you and offering you BIG HUGS!

thefukases said...

Wow. That must be rough.... Make sure you choose somewhere with one of those free flight deals to Japan, hey? ;)

gaijin wife said...


A bit of cuts both ways though I guess. I hope you can at least stay for another year!

When you said that hub didn't get a say I thought the next thing you were going to write was that the wife decides it - but it's uncle SAM aye!! Some times I reckon the wife just needs to reign supreme. A happy mum is a happy home.

Never met you, but the chances of that decrease a million by you and the troops heading back to the US.

Alisa said...

I 100000% know EXACTLY how u feel!
I also spent my childhood in japan (4 yrs) and when it was time to move from Sasebo i was Exactly where u are now.
And, now moving back ..... I know those feelings are only months away! It sucks so bad!!!!

I will be 10000% honest. When we moved from Sasebo i had the worst transition EVER. Cried all the time... could not get over the overwhelming thought that i was not 'home' anymore, and i was 'meant' to be in Japan, as it was a part of me. The heart of me.

It's going to suck, but i would just take a million pictures, eat a ton of your favorite foods, and Dont skimp out on buying those must hav's... and of course stoock up on 100Y goodies, snacks..... There is not much else you can do.

I will be here, for 1.5 more yrs after you, and will be able to sent goodies and such. Ok? :)

having a friend(s) in Japan that will send pictures and goodies was a HUGE help.

Also, i really loved the Va Bch area, ....... it's Really wonderful!

Chin up!!! Maybe you'll get to Extent for a yr or ... even more! :)

Rebecca Sosa said...

Part of me wants you to stay - I can "hear" the true contentment in your writing since you've been in Japan. Part of me wants you to come back - preferably on the East coast and within driving distance.