My 40th birthday is quickly approaching. Bearing down on me like an out-of-control bullet train, and I'm tied to the tracks, helpless to avoid the impending carnage. People say "age is nothing but a number" and "it's how you feel on the inside that counts!" Yeah, well, guess what? INSIDE I feel 60!!!!
The last two years have really kicked my ass emotionally, mentally, even physically. I'm exhausted, disheartened, disappointed and discouraged. I'm working really hard to get to a better place, and most days I'm okay. Better than okay actually. Most days I'm actually pretty good. But with this major milestone birthday looming in just 13 days, I'm feeling......ill at ease. A little shaky, very uncertain and more than a little sad when I look at where I am at this point in my life. THIS is all I've managed to accomplish in my 4 decades on this planet????? (Shit, in 10 short years I'll be half a century old!!!)
So, with all that negativity hanging over my head, I've decided to accomplish something monumental (well, monumental for me at least):
I'M GOING TO CLIMB MT. FUJI!!!!!
Somehow it just seems fitting, conquering that mountain, reaching the summit. I'm hoping it will be the jump start I need to make forty a FABULOUS year.
So, T-8 days and counting. I'll be climbing Fuji-san next Friday night with two co-workers (both much younger and in much better shape than me!). I am determined to reach the top, to watch the sun rise on this new decade of my life. Wish me luck!!